Unimaginative Pseudonym

After my recent anti-mobile phone tirade, I have remembered that they're not entirely bad. Camera phones in particular have a definite benefit - you lot have definitely benefited from all the pictures of me that grace this journal, after all¹.

Believe it or not, though, camera phones don't just exist to take pictures of me. They're an obscenely powerful tool for human social interaction. A person wielding a camera can get most people to obey his every command - that's a fairly well-known concept, but just apply it to the world we now live in; a world where we all² possess our own cameras & carry them with us everywhere we go. Just think about what you can achieve with that power.

No, really think about it.

That is the true power of the modern mobile phone. When you're stood behind a viewfinder, you become a director - not just in your mind, but in the minds of everyone around you. Those in front of the lens will fucking scramble to do your bidding, without even thinking about what they're doing or why they're doing it. You've almost certainly been one of those people in front of the camera before, taking orders from someone for no reason other than he's the one holding the camera.

But you've got a camera of your own. Why shouldn't you be the one giving the orders?

There are probably a few doubters reading this - and that's understandable. You've gone through life taking direction, and it's quite scary to contemplate another way of life - to think about giving direction. But I have proof of the power a camera phone operator wields.

The Experiment

Does a man with a camera phone really wield Supreme Authoritative Power over those he captures within his viewfinder?

The Setup

The Equipment : A mobile phone with a decent camera, dashing good looks & faith in the power of the viewfinder.
The Setting : A pub, Manchester.
The Questions : "Can I take a photo of your breasts?" , "Whose breasts don't I have a picture of yet?"

The Proof




Conclusions

I was right! People will obey a man with a camera (phone) even when he asks for a photo of their tits.

However, this is obviously a small sample group and further data is required...

Follow-up

It occurs to me that pretty much everyone reading this owns a camera of some description. Many of you will be sat before its lens as we speak - that pretty much puts me squarely in the directorial position again³. It also occurs to me that there are quite a few of you - enough to make up a decent sample group. And if you link this experiment⁴ to the people on your friendslists... (all in the interests of science, you understand).

So : Can I see a photo of your breasts?

EDIT : Remember - this experiment is all about volunteering your breasts in the name of science, so if you are some kind of luddite who doesn't wish to participate, please inform your friends of this study. Don't deny them their chance for greatness. Thankyou.

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¹Ok, so you got those before I had a decent camera phone, but the pics are better now.
²Except, apparently, theegoatpig...
³Look, it does. Don't argue. This is Science.
⁴That's what it is, by the way. It's not just some sort of lame excuse to look at tits or anything. This is Science, remember?